Seven of Swords

Aaaaaaarrrrgh! Time, Time, Time....I need more time! I have not written a post in several days. So many pent up stories...

Today work (and work) are crazy-busy - the way I like to be. On the flip side, my writing suffers, my introspection halts.

I'm preparing to head out for a week's holiday in AZ. I will get to visit with friends and family and have a change of scene. I hope to spend (at least some) time writing.

Travel is tough while on my weight management program - 1/2 of my suitcase is full of program food and tools for concocting it! The upside is that I get to fill the case back up with SHOPPING, and PRESENTS and SOUVENIERS!

I'm not really sure what the 7ofS is saying to me today. When I turned this card over I thought "Oh, a mountebank or charlatan has just managed to steal all the swords of a group of knights or nobleman attending the fair with flags flying in the background. He looks pretty happy about running off with them, but he's looking back to make sure he isn't followed."

My instincts are good - the keywords for this card are RUNNING AWAY, LONE WOLF STYLE, HIDDEN DISHONOR. Well, one out of three...? Today I did a little "running away" and procrastinating from other projects because of a priority change (last minute training requirement with an immediate deadline). Yes, I was excited to do something different with my day, and relieved to be out of the grind...but I don't see that there is any dishonor in it - hidden or otherwise.

Certainly the "lone wolf" piece fits me not at all...except that I definitely AM the lone wolf at work. No one else works with me or knows what/how I do my work. The card could be reminding me that my choice not to look at at job listings this morning is a bad one because I don't do my BEST work alone. I really SHOULD be focusing on my goal of having a new, better position in March. Of course I also toy with the idea of building my CM business up...but I have doubt that I could make enough money to pull my weight in our household.

I relate most to the apparent happiness and "getting away with it" aspect of this card. Today I definitely got away with avoiding some boring work, procrastinating my packing, being in denial that I'm leaving on my trip (TOMORROW!) and have no hair conditioner yet to take with me...Hmmmm. Yeah, some avoidance going on there :)

What I didn't avoid (but only narrowly) was the knowledge that I HAVE to keep my PA up very HIGH in order to have a sucessful weight loss week next week, during Thanksgiving. I was going to skip it and just do work, but instead I walked with a co-worker and ran for about 40 minutes.

Today, with some music playing brightly and the sun shining loudly, I felt GREAT as I did a full minute of hardcore RUNNING. My heart rate was up over the limits set by my watchful watch (Thanks for the present sweetie!), but it was worth it. I was out of breath, but felt POWERFUL - almost like I was outrunning fat and calories and negative self esteem!

This afternoon I have not been able to outrun the boredom. I'm hungry, have the muchies and can't settle down to any one task. AT LAST I have had a moment to make my afternoon tea, and eat a little program treat with it. BIG swigs of water, and tea and benefit bar down, I'm starting to feel calmer and as if I could go back to doing some useful work again. For now, I think I'll open some of the past five days and see what was going on!