Are EASY to break. Aint that the truth. Hello, bloggie! Sorry I've been neglecting you on my little vacations. No food, no water, no love. I suppose the irony is that when I neglect my blog I actually neglect my own internal dialog...and it isn't like THAT takes a vacation.
I have no tarot compass...
(2/3) ...and I never even finished this post. Now i will NEVER KNOW what I wanted to say. How SAD.
Thursday, January 19, 2006
Tuesday, January 10, 2006
Knight of Pentacles
A note to my dietician / food coach today:
I know that all those struggling with weight must have days like this. Girlie hormone fluctuations do not help at all either. The alternative is to be ignorant of these emotional highs and lows - let them control me instead of me controlling them.
Interestingly enough, the KnOP has something to say about control and struggles. He takes them head on, with a somewhat pessimistic, if stubborn attitude. I am going to take this card as a reminder to me that I need to remain stubborn in my pursuit of healthy life habits. For right now that means being in a supportive weight management program, and being committeed to the program itself.
The knight is also there to help me see the improvement project I've been working on through to the bitter end. And I feel that it will be bitter. Despite this, I need to buckle down, complete the process, write this report and move on to a 'New Day' in my career here. It is time to be finished with this project and move to the next thing - in that way I cannot agree with the knight - it is imperative that I be able to change and move to something fresh and new.
I’m in a very strange mood today and it is definitely affecting my food intake. I’m all moody – felt like crying TWICE this am listening to the radio before I even left my bedroom - and I appear to be having an allergy attack on top of that (I do NOT have adult onset allergies!). I am finally feeling awake enough to function (at 3PM?!). My body feels like it was on strike after the two-hour bellydance class last night that I went to pre-exhausted.
I feel like someone else, and on top of that it is a VERY bad hair day…
I’ve been surviving on caffeine as a result…3 cups of black tea with nonfat milk, my morning shake and then HMR double-shake oatmeal for something warm and comforting. Banana and carrots and (soon) an apple and oranges as snacks. I have 2 pre-made shakes on hand…I may even go and warm up the chocolate one so that it will be soothing and comforting…wonder if the vanilla one would be good hot…hmmmmm. I was craving BBQ chicken or lasagna but didn’t have either one here. I may eat a soybean chili with corn (a favorite) but can’t decide – which my old coach used to say meant for her that she wasn’t REALLY hungry – just head hungry.
Anyway, I think my point is that the additive EC – having supportive food constantly in my environment - is going to continue to be a fundamental and critical strategy. I think I’ll go for a quick walk…but it is SO COLD OUT THERE…
I know that all those struggling with weight must have days like this. Girlie hormone fluctuations do not help at all either. The alternative is to be ignorant of these emotional highs and lows - let them control me instead of me controlling them.
Interestingly enough, the KnOP has something to say about control and struggles. He takes them head on, with a somewhat pessimistic, if stubborn attitude. I am going to take this card as a reminder to me that I need to remain stubborn in my pursuit of healthy life habits. For right now that means being in a supportive weight management program, and being committeed to the program itself.
The knight is also there to help me see the improvement project I've been working on through to the bitter end. And I feel that it will be bitter. Despite this, I need to buckle down, complete the process, write this report and move on to a 'New Day' in my career here. It is time to be finished with this project and move to the next thing - in that way I cannot agree with the knight - it is imperative that I be able to change and move to something fresh and new.
Monday, January 09, 2006
Sunday, January 08, 2006
Saturday, January 07, 2006
Friday, January 06, 2006
Thursday, January 05, 2006
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
Five of Swords
Welcome back to Reality. I did something fun just now - I googled ancient history. Well, I googld someone I knew from High School. Why? Well, why not? I wonder a lot about people I was close to...for years, or even a moment. I wonder about them because I wonder about ME. As I grow and change and develop my perspective changes, and more than that - I long to see and understand the perspectives of others who interracted with me.
It isn't about sex. Really. Several years ago, before I met me husband, yeah, that could have been what it was about, but now, not so much. I'm genuinely interested in knowing "Where are they now."
In fact, the more I thought about this, the more I liked the idea. I like the idea of an arch of time - a story that covers an arch of time that is 50% ideas about sex as a character develops and the other 50% about the actual experience of sex after you've had it. I probably should NOT post this on my blog - since then anybody (nobody) reading this can steal my idea (which I'll probably never do anything with anyway).
It isn't about sex. Really. Several years ago, before I met me husband, yeah, that could have been what it was about, but now, not so much. I'm genuinely interested in knowing "Where are they now."
In fact, the more I thought about this, the more I liked the idea. I like the idea of an arch of time - a story that covers an arch of time that is 50% ideas about sex as a character develops and the other 50% about the actual experience of sex after you've had it. I probably should NOT post this on my blog - since then anybody (nobody) reading this can steal my idea (which I'll probably never do anything with anyway).
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