Appreciation

A few weeks ago a friend of mine wrote to me:

"So BTW... you know those little cards you made for us for your birthday tea? I had slipped mine into my purse before leaving and forgot about it. I was sitting here in my office last week cleaning my purse out before leaving for LA and found it again. I was just so touched by what you wrote that I have hung it up on my office bulletin board. Now when I'm feeling crappy at work, I just look at that and smile. It's hanging out right next to my stolen napkin from Bimbos. Your card and the naked lady riding the girly fish are bulletin board friends."

This made me feel *great* and I wrote this back:

"I always felt like I had the crappiest friends in the whole world when I was young. I vowed that I would learn how to be a “good” friend when I was older. I certainly didn’t manage that when I was in high-school; I made some great friends for a little while in college, but wasn’t able to keep them.

In the present day, I may not manage my friendships as well as I possibly could. The fact remains that the current set of peeps are the ones I hope to keep for the 50 years that remain to me in this lifetime! These days that means finding opportunities to say “Thank You” and be appreciative when they present themselves.

It feels like it took a really long time to figure out what that 5-year old at Disneyland reminded me of on my birthday: It actually does wonders to take the time to say, “Thank You. I think you’re cool. Friends Forever…?!?”

The exchange also prompted a very fine discussion with my husband about how we make intentional choices about who we are.

I would love to write the Disneyland 33rd Birthday story and say a little more about the conversation about how we learn to use empathy as a tool for persoective...maybe later.