Rainy Monday

I was reading my friend Michael's blog and he did this cool exercise online called a Johari Window http://kevan.org/johari.

It is a pretty self-explanatory little tool that assesses how perceptions of self overlap or disconnect with perceptions of others. This may be a good way to explore that self/others disconnect that I am plagued by so often. I'll be sure to process how it turns out here.

(Several hours later)

Beware the Nohari...so let's say you open yourself up and say "Yo! Friends and family. What do you think my WORST personality traits are?"

And you get the list. And well, it's negative because, well, you're asking for the negative. And well, there aren't any mitigating factors...no "why" do you think this, or opportunity to discuss the level at which someone thinks your bad traits are showing themselves. The same people are saying the nicest mostest wonderfullest things about you on the Johari...but the negative is still there, and has some evidence, experience or perceptive validity behind it. And you have no context.

That's my current experience of the Johari / Nohari windows. I want context! Examples! Discussion. A list of forced-choice adjectives is only so useful.

Biggest Shocker so Far: My mother thinks I'm insensitive (!?!). I can only describe this as hilarious. My experience of interacting with my mother is that I always so hyper-conscious of her feelings, my feelings, and maintaining some distance from being consumed by our conflicting "stuff" that that I have to assume the resulting insensitivity of her must be a survival strategy. Probably combined with a honest dose of "not-getting-her" since she's solidly on the introvert side of the relationship wall.

Biggest "Uh-Huh" so Far: 100% of those surveyed find me "inflexible." I agree with that. I like schedules, plans, and boy, do I have opinions. Changing paths is very difficult for me. Changing habits is even harder. Not as hard as it is for some people I know, though...